73 Transcript: On Wholeness, Alignment and Sisterhood (Nisha Moodley)

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J: You're listening to the Vibrant Happy Women podcast, episode number 73.

N: And as I come back to the truth that there is nothing broken about me and come back also to the beauty of my life, there's a way that that kind of opens the door and gives me access to being a contribution in the world in all the ways that I see fit to be a contribution in the world.

Intro: Welcome to the Vibrant Happy Women podcast, stories of vibrant women living happy lives. And now, your host, Jen Riday.

J: Hey there, everyone, welcome to Vibrant Happy Women. I'm Dr. Jen Riday, I'm so glad you're here. Last week, I talked with Jocelyn Sams all about how she was able to flip her lifestyle so that she could work less and live more. Now, lots of you reached out to me and said that was one of your favorite episodes of all time. And it's kind of funny, every week I have a handful or several people reach out to me and say the same thing. It kind of seems like there's an episode out there for everyone. Many of you write in and say, “Hey, I'm binge listening and it's a sad day because I caught up on all the Vibrant Happy Women podcast episodes,” boohoo. So I want to thank you all for listening and being supportive and I hope it's bringing you value to your lives you deserve that. This is a movement to be happier women. Today, I'll be talking with Nisha Moodley all about wholeness alignment sisterhood and your big ‘why’. My conversation with Nisha was really thought-provoking. She's a beautiful soul so I can't wait for you to listen to this episode. Let's go ahead and jump right in.

I'm talking with Nisha Moodley today and she's a Women's Leadership coach and the founder of Global Sisterhood Day. Inspired by the belief that the world will be set free by women who are free and sisterhood is key to a woman's freedom, her work is focused on midwifing women back to sisterhood and the truth of their innate beauty and brilliance. Nisha supports communities of women leaders in mastermind groups, retreats, and online courses to live love and lead with depth and devotion. You can explore more about Nisha at nishamoodley.com. And I really want to welcome you to the show today, Nisha.

N: Thank you, I'm so happy to be here. Thanks for the invitation.

J: Yeah, you're welcome. And let's hear your favorite quote.

N: So I think there are a lot of quotes that inspire me in the world, but I would say that really like the motto like my personal motto and the thing that I live by and the thing that I sort of call back into my heart every single day, it's actually part of my morning practice, is actually what you just shared. It's, “The world will be set free by women who are free,” and sisterhood is key to women's freedom. And that personal motto has transformed my life personally, it's transformed my work and it informs my work on a daily basis. And it really is the cornerstone, for me, of everything that I do. And, like I said, it's part of my morning practice to actually… and I highly recommend this for anybody, you know, if there's like a motto or a quote or something that is like really related to your big ‘why’ in the world to sort of sit each morning and call that into your heart and really like feel what that means to you, like make it alive in your system in each morning because I really have found for myself that doing that helps to guide my days and really be a fun productive way. So that is my personal motto.

J: It's beautiful. And just delving into it a little further, tell us what it means to be set free.

N: Well, I think that there is… it's a great question. There is… you know, there are all the extrinsic freedoms that we talk about. So, you know, I think in the entrepreneurial world, we think of to have like images of people working from laptops on the beach, I'm like, “That's a very like, you know, extreme expression of freedom, right? We're not like quote/unquote ‘shackled’ to a cubicle or to our desk.” But there's also just the most basic, you know, extrinsic human freedom which is like the ability to roam free on the planet. You know, I'm not imprisoned, I am able to like move about freely in my country. I'm able to speak my mind. I have access to the internet. Like, these are all extremes and freedoms that I personally have the luxury of taking for granted because that's just how my life is. And actually, this whole quote was inspired by the Dalai Lama quote, “The world would be saved by the Western woman,” and I was like, “Okay, what does that mean? And which ones?”

J: Wow.

N: Like, “Who's going to save the world (quote/unquote ‘save the world’)?” And… and what I realized is, you know, my interpretation is that as, you know, Western women, we have a lot of these extrinsic freedoms that cannot be taken for granted by all women in all parts of the world; and not even by all women, you know, in the Western world.

J: Mm-hmm.

N: But by and large, we have a lot of these freedoms. And, you know, I don't know about you, but I've never worried about whether my child would starve to death, you know, the next day because we were so depleted and malnourished and had no money or access to food; like these basic freedoms that I get to take for granted that a lot of other women don't. And then there's our intrinsic sense of freedom like my sense of wholeness and inner peace and connection to myself and to spirit. And so what I realized, what my perception of what he was saying is that, because we aren't so tied up in basic human rights like having our basic human rights taken care of basic, basic human rights, we actually get to set our sights on something more. And through setting our sights on something more, both for ourselves and… we can set our sight on things not just for ourselves, but also for the world. And so just to sort of unpacking that for me what that means is that, as I attend to my own sense of intrinsic freedom, like as I come back to my sense of wholeness like that is always there, but I just have to come back into touch with, and as I come back to the truth that there is nothing broken about and come back also to the beauty of my life, there's a way that that kind of opens the door and gives me access to being a contribution in the world in all the ways that I see fit to be a contribution in the world. And I actually get to do my work and live my life in a really aligned way because I'm not focusing on, you know, the illusion that I am not somehow whole.

J: Mm, yes.

N: Right? I know that I am whole; I know my wholeness. And because I know my wholeness… and that's not perfection, like I'm not perfect, none of us are perfect, and it's not about trying to be perfect, but whole. Like, there's nothing innately wrong like fundamentally broken about… about you or about any of us. And if I know that truly deeply, I can set my sights on being of service and being of service in a way that is… feels, to me, to be truly aligned.

J: That is beautiful. And tell us more about Global Sisterhood Day, how you're using that alignment.

N: So Global Sisterhood Day is a global free annual event that was actually inspired by a really beautiful sort of call and response. You know, I've been running my business now for 10 years, but over the course of those years, as I have learned just the power of sisterhood and started to work with women in the context of community and talk a lot about sisterhood and community and the importance of women supporting one another, I have received, I'm sure, thousands at this point of comments and questions and, you know, just women sharing, “Oh gosh, I wish I had that. I wish I had other women, like-minded women, who I could connect with, who I could support, who could support me. I just wish I had community.” And I thought, “Well, I'm not going…” not every woman in the world who wants community is going to hire me or hire someone else, you know, or come on a retreat. Like, that's beautiful for the people who feel called to do that and who have the means to do that, but that's not everybody. And, you know, “Is there a way…” I just started sitting with, “Is there a way that we can create that opportunity for people that won't cost anything?” And so I got the idea for Global Sisterhood Day like, “What if we had a day that was devoted to highlighting the beauty of relationships between women and what is possible in relationships between women?” And, you know, I recognize that International Women's Day it's an important day, it has its place. And I know that International Women's Day is, you know, among other things, about justice and equality for women.

J: Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

N: And what I realized is I wanted a day that was about relationship between women and healing relationships between women. Because I see that, as we heal the relationships between each other, that also supports us healing our relationships with ourselves and our bodies, I think it impacts how we raise our children and, you know, so and so, so on and so forth down the line. So we created Global Sisterhood Day in 2015 as a response to all of those requests and inquiries and desires that I kept hearing. And, you know, we've iterated a little bit over the years to try to improve our technology and I'm really excited next year in 2018 to really take things to the next level. And we've had women participate from about 75 countries.

J: Mm-hmm.

N: And I'm hoping to expand that and bring it into other languages; yeah, just take it to the next level.

J: So I need to put this on my calendar. When is Global Sisterhood Day?


N: Well, we haven't actually secured the date for 2018 yet.

J: Uh-huh.

N: But historically, it has been the third Saturday in March.

J: Okay.

N: And, you know, not as easy to remember as a specific date, you know, but we've always… I've always felt that doing it on the weekend makes it more accessible for more people to gather in person.

J: That’s true; beautiful.

N: Yeah.

J: Wow, I'm so inspired already.

N: Oh, thank you.

J: But let's I think launch into your low points and hear a time in your life when you struggled and how you came out of that place.

N: Well, being that I'm a human, I have many.


N: You know, this is actually maybe a story that I haven't shared before because I have many; I could choose any of them. But it was actually about a year and a half ago… a year and a half, maybe 2; no, about a year and a half ago. And it was actually… I went to a breakup and I had been in a relationship for 5 years and, you know, we'd had our on-and-off. We had broken up a couple of times over those 5 years as we were trying to find our way, but this was really the end…

J: Mm-hmm.

N: … of the partnership. And I was devastated. I mean, I was… well, it’s the series of things. You know, I got divorced in 2011 and kind of bought right into this 5-year relationship very quickly after my separation from my ex-husband. And so I think just like, you know, there was a lot of sadness that I came into the relationship with. And, in a way, I think the relationship was somewhat of a lifeline for me.

J: Mm-hmm.

N: You know, it helped to… it offered me this like… you know what it's like when you're first in a relationship and you're falling in love, it was like fun and exciting and adventurous. And, you know, we also happened to have a very like fun and adventurous life together; we were traveling and, you know, going to amazing restaurants. And so it was just this like very alive time in my life when we got together, but mixed in with all of the mourning and the sadness from the end of my marriage and just everything I was processing with that. And I… I think, in some ways, you know, the fact that it became a lifeline for me was there was some beauty in that in the time at the time, and also it created a challenge, which is that I have felt very attached to that relationship.

J: Mm-hmm.

N: And so the times where we separated, you know, understandably, I was really devastated. And so when it was the end, I was profoundly devastated. And it was really a… you know, looking back, a really beautiful opportunity to take this belief that I have in the power of sisterhood and put it to good use…

J: Mm-hmm.

N: … and to live it in my own life because, you know, when you're that despairing, as I'm sure everyone listening can relate to some point in life, you know, whether your relationship has ended or you've lost a pet or someone, you know, has died, you know, somebody that you care about, I mean, these are all very different experiences, but just that very human feeling of despair and deep pain, and I think when we're in that place, we can be a little bit of a broken record. And there's nothing wrong with that but, you know, there's just a bit of sometimes a groundhog day of sadness like, you know, every day really just process and through the pain while it's there in those very, you know, potent first few days or weeks or months, depending on a person's, you know, processing time. So, for me, just feeling like I was in this deep despair and sadness and I noticed that my impulse was to keep it to myself a little bit, you know, to not really sure it with my girlfriends or just share it, but not be too needy… (Laughs)

J: Ah, yeah.

N: … in friendship. You know, to kind of hold myself together or hold myself… and ‘try to hold myself together’ might be a better descriptor. And I was able to hold myself and comfort myself and care for myself. And it wasn't like I demanded that my friends, you know, pick up when I called or that they dropped everything to take care of me; it wasn't a demanding kind of request for support. And I found that, when people bring that demanding kind of request for support, other people generally tend to back away because it feels like a lot, you know? But instead, what I got to practice was, “Okay, even though I have this impulse to pull away, I want to live in a world where we show up for one another and we take care of one another and where, you know, we tend to each other's hearts and we aren't so busy all the time that we can't take a minute to… to be with a friend.” So if I want to live in that kind of world, I have to create that kind of world, and that means, not just being that friend who shows up for my friends, but also being that friend who’s messy and vulnerable and need support. And so I really took myself to my friends and got to practice, you know, being messy and vulnerable and needing support, but also holding myself and being totally okay and understanding with my friends not responding or being busy, you know, having their own life stuff, and continuing to say, “Okay, like if she isn't available, who else can I call to talk through this right now? Because I'm feeling like… and if no one is available, let me sit and like be with myself and see how I can hold myself through this.”

J: Yeah.

N: So that was a really big lesson in action to practice, you know, “If I want to create this kind of world, then I have to be willing to be on both sides of it; you know, to be the one who is giving and also the one who is receiving.”

J: Mm-hmm.

N: And I also just think, that time in my life, I remember this one moment where I was coming back in a taxi from a girlfriend's house and I was alone in the taxi and it's the middle of the day and I… you know, I had like my dark sunglasses on and I've been crying for god knows how long, and I just felt like I was in such a low… that was like the low moment; the lowest moment was that moment. And I just thought, “I need to find a crack of light, like a little glimmer of hope. Like, where is my…? I don't even… I don't have to feel hopeful, but can I just see a glimmer of hope?” And I asked myself the question, “Who do I know myself to be?” I mean, it was just a totally intuitive in-the-moment question like, “Who do I know myself to be?” in other words like, “What do I know that is good and strong about myself that will help me through this time?”


J: Mm-hmm.

N: And I was like, “Well, I know myself to be a woman who will look for the gold, like who will mine for the gold at the heart of this challenge. Like, eventually, I will receive the gifts, the wisdom, the blessings from this very challenging experience.” And that was like my one little glimmer of hope in that dark time was just sitting with that question, “Who do I know myself to be?” and discovering that one thing that I could hold about myself that was like… that I could be proud of, that I could admire, and that I could trust.

J: Yeah, someone who could mine for the gold at the heart of it.

N: Mm-hmm.

J: So… so many gifts and wisdom and blessings probably came from that. And what… shifting forward to today, what is something that is exciting you today? I know you mentioned you have a little baby at home.

N: Yeah! Yeah, you know, I mean, I think it's just such an endless source of exhaustion and also excitement to have a 6-month-old baby at home. Just watching him develop and grow has been, like I don't know if ‘exciting’ is the word, but very like nourishing and sweet for me. And, you know, little things like, you know, when I pat the teddy bear and then he pats the teddy bear, and I think, “Of course, my child's a genius.”


N: Even if it was just a fluke. But just watching him grow and develop has been really exciting. And the other big thing is just like, after a year and a half of, you know, through being pregnant and having a child, for a year and a half, I really haven't felt very much outward flowing creativity; like, I haven't felt creative in my work. And that's been really hard for me because I'm used to feeling like in the flow creatively and like I could sit down and write an email to my mailing list in an hour, you know, or 2 or 3 depending on, you know, how, you know, deep and challenging the writing is, then I could just sit down and make it happen. And what I have found is like, I sit down and I'm like, “Ugh.”

J: (Laughs)

N: Nothing comes.

J: Mm-hmm.

N: And I've had some very wise friends while I was pregnant and also when my baby was very first born just be like, “Listen, all your creativity is going into creating this human.”

J: Yes.

N: “So you got to give yourself a break.” And that was really hard and it's still hard because, you know, I'm nursing, literally, I'm like life force energy is going into this being.

J: Mm-hmm.

N: I don't get to keep it all for myself and generate it out into creativity in the world, and it's been a real test of my patience and self-trust and trust in the universe that it'll come back and that I can trust it to come back. And so, yeah, I think the thing that I'm excited about is that I'm just feeling that creativity come online again and come alive again.

J: Oh nice.

N: And…

J: That's a good feeling.

N: You know, being able to sit down and write and have, you know, things that make sense come out, which has been really wonderful.

J: Yes. And you shared something that's exciting you, what's something you're currently struggling with, if anything? Maybe with the creativity coming back, you're good to go.

N: Oh, I mean, there's always a little something that we…


N: …. that we have. I think the current struggle, for me, is… and, you know, I think a lot of parents will relate to this, perhaps especially in the mothers with small children or children that, you know, have a lot of… a lot of needs that they're present to. But I think the biggest challenge for me right now is navigating how to care for him and work, you know? (Laughs)

J: Yes.

N: How to get work done and show up for my son and also take care of myself.

J: Mm-hmm.

N: And what I've found fortunately is that I've… I think I've done a fairly decent job of showing up for him and also doing at least the basic things that I need for my self-care, I found that it's like, you know, if I can… I don't have time to, you know, spend half the day at the spa right now necessarily, I mean, I… I'm sure I could create that, but that's not like something I'm doing 3 times a week; let's put it that way.

J: Mm-hmm.

N: And so it's like potent self-care, that's what I've looked at.

J: Ah.

N: It's like, “What kind of gives me the most bang for my buck?” you know, “So what are the foods that are most nutrient-dense that make me feel the best? Great, I'm going to eat those. What are the things that like, if I spend an hour doing that, I'm going to feel so good, not just a little bit better, so much better?” or at least I have the opportunity to feel so much better because that's sort of how it trends. So I've done fairly well at, you know, taking care of the basics, my son, my well-being, household stuff, and taking care of my existing clients. It's growing the business and I feel so much inspiration for that, that that's been a challenge or figuring out how to jigsaw everything together to make it fit. (Laughs)

J: Right. Oh, the age-old question for moms, right?

N: Yeah. Oh my goodness, where is, you know, community tribal living?

J: Yeah, right. Isn’t it true? We create a lot of our problems by living so uncollectively. (Laughs)

N: Oh, totally. Yeah, absolutely.

J: Yeah.

N: Mm-hmm.

J: Well, let's take a break for our sponsor and then we'll come back and talk about a few of your favorite things.

N: Great.

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(Interview resumes) [22:06]

J: And we're back. Let's talk about your favorite… well, favorite habit that has contributed to your success.

N: Oh my goodness. Yeah, every morning, I just like take a moment and I call into my heart a few questions. So I ask myself like, “What's my big ‘why’?” And, for me, again, kind of going back to what we said earlier, it's, “The world will be set free by women who are free and sisterhood is key.” I called that back into my heart and kind of make it alive, let it live and breathe in this moment in my being, and see how it inspires me; so, “What's my big ‘why’?” And that's my ‘why’ for the world, I also have my ‘why’ for myself which, you know, is about sustainability and health and well-being and thriving and joy for my family and for my kid, you know? And so I sort of feel into all of that, the things that inspires need to actually like be in the world and be in my life and be active in my day to day. And then I ask myself, “What do I really need to do today?” which is a reality check question. It's a like look, myself in the mirror and get honest question. Because, I don't know about you, but I have the tendency (and I think the most ambitious people do) to try to imagine that I could pull off 10 really important big things in a day.

J: (Laughs). Yes.

N: And the reality is, I'm probably not going to. And if I expect myself to, I'm going to feel a massive sense of failure and probably do less than if I really focused on what I actually really need to do that day.

J: Right.

N: And I find that that helps me focus on that thing first or those few things first.

J: Mm-hmm.

N: So, to recap, question number 1 is, “What's my ‘why’?” question number 2 is, “What do I really need to do today?” and then the third question is, “What would make me proud?

J: Hmm.

N: And so that question is like, “When I'm laying in bed tonight and I'm reflecting on my day and I'm looking back, what could I do today that would have me feel a sense of pride?” And that's where I… you know, I'm like, “Gosh, you know, I would love to take… I would love to walk with my son, you know, just take off in the middle of the day for an hour and go for a walk,” you know,” or, “I should call my dad back.” You know, the things that I don't really need to do, but they will make my life so much richer.

J: Yeah.

N: And… you know, and often, that's where things like exercise, you know, or eating well, like making healthy choices, those things get woven in. So what did… I mean, now it's sort of second nature and I don't need the post-it note, but I originally just made a post-it note, stuck it beside my bed with those 3 questions on it. And asking myself those 3 questions every morning has been profoundly game-changing for my life.

J: That is great, I'm definitely going to take some of that into my morning routine.

N: Sweet.

J: What is your favorite easy meal?

N: Well, these days, it's really like cooking up several simple things that I can mix and match together, you know, over the course of a few days so I don't get really bored.

J: Ah.

N: So… but I would say like my favorite easy meal right now is breakfasts; I'm big on breakfasts.

J: Uh-huh.

N: And my breakfast is steamed cauliflower, lightly steamed cauliflower, with like really nice raw butter and some salt and pepper and a cup of bone broth. And…

J: Mm, nourishing.

N: Yeah. My partner has been totally geeking out on the pressure cooker. We just bought a pressure cooker. He's…

J: Uh-huh.

N: … the… I love to cook, but he does most of the cooking; bless him. And so he's been making bone broth like a madman and it's been wonderful. So I've been having bone broth and steamed cauliflower every morning just as my first meal of the day, and then sometimes I'll have a green or eggs or something to go with it, but that's my favorite easy meal right now.

J: Yum! Do you follow a certain dietary lifestyle in any way or have things you like to eat and don't like to eat?

N: You know, I have played with so many different… you know, so many different ways of eating over the years. I've never been a big dieter, in that I was like restricting food or counting calories or cutting out fat, but I have tried many different like more sort of holistic conscientious ways of eating, let's say. And what I've landed on now is that I eat tons of vegetables, small amounts of meat and fish, and it's really important to me that we eat the best quality that we can.

J: Mm-hmm.

N: And I think for anybody, eating the best quality that you can afford is so… it makes such a difference. So we eat the best quality that we can find and that makes sense for us as a family. And bone broths… and I tend to shy away from sugar and dairy and gluten, especially dairy; doesn't really work for my little guy. Yeah.

J: Great. What's your favorite kitchen gadget? Your partner, right, with the…

N: (Laughs)

J: No, just kidding.


J: You said he has the pressure cooker. (Laughs)

N: It's true. You know, I'm going to say right now, that pressure cooker is really… it's got my heart in this moment.

J: Uh-huh.

N: So it might be the pressure cooker. Oh my gosh, I wish I could give you 10. The pressure… I'm going to… I'm cheating. The pressure cooker is a favorite kitchen gadget. We use a soma water filter; the glass one.

J: Mm-hmm.

N: I love our water filter, I think it makes the water taste amazing.

J: Mm-hmm.

N: And also, I'm a huge fan of the toaster oven. I have a really cool retro style toaster oven.

J: Uh-huh.

N: I know I'm totally cheating; I'm giving 3.

J: Yeah.

N: But…

J: No problem.

N: You know, you turn the… you turn the stove on in the summer and your whole house is cooking, and it's a ton of energy that's being used, and it's like, “I don't need my whole house to be heated right now and all this energy for one little thing.” And so we… I don't have a toaster, I have a toaster oven, I use it for toast, we use it for heating things up in the middle of the day, I love it; love my toaster oven.

J: So do you use the microwave as well or heat everything in the toaster oven?

N: You know, we… we had a microwave that was built into our house when we moved in.

J: Uh-huh.

N: And every once in a while, I’ll use it in a pinch, but I don't use it for the baby's food.

J: Yeah, right.

N: I don't use it to cook anything, I'll just use it to like heat something up of mine if I'm in a pinch. But generally speaking, I use the stovetop and the toaster oven for heating things up.

J: And your pressure cooker, is that an Instant Pot?

N: It's not the Instant Pot brand, it's another brand, but I think it was comparable to the Instant Pot.

J: Yeah, okay.

N: Yeah.

J: Great.

N: Yeah.

J: And what's your favorite book?

N: Oh my gosh, I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that most people give you like business books or personal development books, is that true?

J: Lots of Brené Brown and Elizabeth Gilbert.

N: Uh-huh.

J: Yeah. (Laughs)

N: Yeah. I mean, some of my favorites, so I get that. And I love… you know, I love… if you look at my bookshelf, which I'm actually looking at right now, it's mostly full of that stuff, but I'm going to tell you my really my favorite book of all time. If I could only save one book in a storm, it would be Tom Robbins’ ‘Jitterbug Perfume’.

J: Okay.

N: It's a fiction book, it's exquisitely written, it's totally transporting. And I know, for myself as an entrepreneur, I spent years where all I read was personal development in business books, and I still love those books and then still mostly what I read, but every once in a while, just indulging and some really… a really beautiful piece of fiction, I just find it like massages my brain, it has me more creative in my work, and just like it feels so good to feel excited to pick up a book and kind of get back into the story.

J: Yeah.

N: Yeah, so that's my favorite book, ‘Jitterbug Perfume’ by Tom Robbins.

J: Thank you. And the best advice you’ve ever received.

N: Oh, so many amazing pieces of advice. I think the best advice I've ever received is… it might be from Marie Forleo, actually.

J: Mm-hmm.

N: I was in a year-long mastermind with Marie Forleo, or at least the best advice it's coming to me in this moment, and it came by way of coaching. So I was trying to, at the time, decide, “Well, should I do videos for my news orders are should… should I do written newsletters?”

J: Mm-hmm.

N: And she said, “Well, what do you like doing?” and I said, “I like doing both.” Like, if I only did video, I would really miss writing. I love to write, but every once in a while, it feels fun to whip out the video camera and just write something… cord something, I mean.

J: Mm-hmm.

N: And she said, “Okay, so do both.” And in that moment, it was just such freedom to just follow what feels good, what I enjoy and, you know, what intuitively like works for me.

J: Mm-hmm.

N: And that was a really profound lesson in running my business that I've taken with me and I'm so grateful for.

J: “Do what you like,” yes that's a great. Well, I'll remind our listeners that they can find links to ‘Jitterbug Perfume’ and everything else you talked about on our show notes page at jenriday.com/74. And now, let's hear a formula from you; a formula of things that contribute to your happiness.

N: Oh, okay. Well, time with friends, I always, always make time for friends and spend a good amount of time with my friends, which I feel really blessed for; so time with friends, especially like one dinner a week, at least.

J: Mm-hmm.

N: One dinner a week with friends, no matter what we have going on.

J: Mm-hmm.

N: That's number 1. Number 2, getting support for my son, like care for my son, regardless of, you know, whether its family or, you know, friends or, you know, somebody that I'm hiring who I’ll eventually end up becoming friends. But what I've been optimizing for is just that I feel calm in their presence.

J: Hmm.

N: Like, that they bring a calming presence into our home. And that's actually… I mean, at his young age (he's just 6 months old), that has been game-changing for me to have that support and to be clear about when we need it as a family, and then to have that person be a calming presence in our home, yeah. Best quality food that we can afford and no skipping meals; that means, every day, breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

J: Ah.

N: Yeah. And clean filtered water, lots of it.

J: Mm-hmm.

N: And, yeah, I think like another piece is just bringing, to my work, bringing… like bringing my full self; bringing like my passions and the things that are like firing me up like politically or in the world and being willing to sort of bring that aspect of myself as well. And also just sharing about the truth of my life in a way that's accountable, like I don't expect my community to support me; that's not what people have shown up for. So I have to share from a place of like I've… you know, I've got me, I've got my support system, but also being willing to share the imperfection of my life and what I'm learning and where I'm growing. And, yeah, I think those are our first few things. Oh, and I think the other thing is just, I have the overarching belief that people are doing their best with what they have…

J: Mm-hmm.

N: … and that all that everyone wants, at the end of the day, is to love and feel loved. And I just find that holding that as true, whether or not it's actually true, just holding it as true has me relate to the world differently and relate to people differently and, you know, meet other people's like frustration or ignorance or unkindness with a little bit more compassion and generosity.

J: Mm-hmm, great; that's beautiful. Well, let's have one challenge from you to our listeners and then tell us where they can find you and then we'll say goodbye.

N: So, to make it simple, I'm going to make my challenge what I shared earlier in the call, which is, pull out that post-it note, write on it 3 questions, “What's my ‘why’? What do I really need to do today?” and, “What would make me proud?” and just try it out. Try it out tomorrow morning, stick it on your bedside table. If you're used to rolling over and picking your phone up, put it right on your phone before bed so that you see it before you see your screen, you know, or on your bedside lamp; somewhere where it can be the first thing you do. Just take a moment. You don't have to do anything fancy, just lay in bed and just ask yourself those questions and see how it changes your day.

J: And then we can find you at nishamoodley.com?

N: nishamoodley.com and Global Sisterhood Day is sisterhoodday.com.

J: sisterhoodday.com. Nisha, this has been amazing. I… I feel a lot of good energy from you and I want to thank you for being on the show.

N: Thanks, Jen, so grateful to be here. Thank you so much for your thoughtful questions.

J: Take care.

N: Nisha’s doing really good things in the world and I'm so glad I got the chance to interview her. I want to challenge you to try what she said and to ask yourself those 3 questions, “What is your big ‘why’? What do you need to do each day?” and, “What would make you proud?” That's a really amazing challenge; I'm going to be trying that right along with you. Be sure to come back next week, I'll be talking with Dr. Beth Westie all about women's health and fitness. She makes the claim (and I think she's right) that men and women are physiologically different. Women have cycles, women have hormones, and those hormones affect our weight and our fat loss. So she has some tips that will help us and I think you're going to love that one. I will see you next week, and until then, make it a phenomenal week, be happy and do more of what you love. Take care.

Outro: Thanks for listening to the Vibrant Happy Women podcast at www.jenriday.com.